18. You Teach People How To Treat You

Does this sound like you? Your job stinks. You’re the butt of all jokes. You’re disrespected continuously by your friends and significant other. It doesn’t always have to be that way. Learn to teach people how to treat you!

When I was a young man, my mom taught me this valuable lesson.

“You Teach People How To Treat You”

The Associate Editor at Psych Central, Margarita Tartakovsky, M.S. says,

“People learn how to treat you based on what you accept from them.”

Here are a few examples where you can teach others to treat you better.

Your Job Stinks

Your boss always takes advantage of you. You run errands on your lunch break. Many of your co-workers don’t respect you. You work the shifts no one else will cover and pick up after other’s laziness. You’ve done it for so long you’re afraid you’ll be in trouble if you stand up for yourself.

About 18 years ago, I worked at a gym that had terrible management. Employees hated working there, and most of the staff did the bare minimum to get through their day.

One day, a toilet broke in the men’s locker room, and raw sewage flooded the floor. The janitor (who was overworked and underappreciated) said, “Screw this, I’m out!” and quit his job as the locker room continued to flood.

I was always the guy who would cover other employees’ shifts, help fix gym equipment, wash the windows, etc. When something needed to be done, I thought it was my duty to take care of the task, even if that wasn’t my job. So, as the bathroom flooded, the manager snapped his fingers at me and yelled, “McCoy! Get a mop and clean that up! You’d better figure out how to shut off the water too!” I obeyed and spent hours doing a job that sucked. When I finished, the manager said, “Hurry up! You’ve got a lot of sales calls to catch up on!”

Looking back, I realize that I was responsible for the way I people treated me. The other employees at that gym weren’t commanded (or even asked) to clean up the mess. Since I never stood up for myself, management knew it was easy to take advantage of me.

My mistake wasn’t in being the employee who went above and beyond. You should always try to be the hardest worker.

The mistake I made was allowing someone to snap their fingers at me disrespectfully, then follow their orders. The first time I let that manager snap his fingers at me and tell me what to do, I created a pattern of disrespect.

You’re The Butt Of All Jokes

We’ve all seen someone in a situation where their friends or significant other makes jokes at their expense. Others make fun of their outfit, say they look fat, tease about how they pronounce a word or make snide remarks.

Often, people will criticize you, so they can stay in control. You’re the butt of all jokes and made to feel stupid, but when you confront them, they say something along the lines of, “Geeze! What’s your problem? I was only kidding! Can’t you take a joke?”

If you don’t confront the problem, you set the tone for treating you this way. It will get worse as time goes on.

Here’s How To Gain Some Respect

Small changes can create a ripple effect and give you more confidence to make even more significant changes in the future.

The Customer Isn’t Always Right

Thinking otherwise can result in a severe disservice to you, your employees, and your customers. At Best Cellular, our customer service reps take calls from all over the United States. The majority of all calls are friendly, and the customer is happy to be speaking with a friendly, local customer service rep. Best Cellular employees are expected to treat every customer with dignity and respect, but we never allow our staff to be abused or mistreated.

I’ve empowered our reps to teach people how to treat them. Best Cellular employees know when someone yells at you on the phone, it’s okay to tell them, “That is not okay. Do not use profanity with me. Stop yelling at me, or I will end this call.”

Give yourself the right to tell someone when they’re treating you poorly. Take action if they don’t respect your request.